Exhaustion......

So obviously I am exhausted right?!? Why you may ask are you exhausted. Well, I have not been sleeping well number one and number two the last two days I drove to DC and back for appointments for Belle. Don't get me wrong, I want to take her, but DC and all of that driving exhausts me!

So yesterday I took Belle to the allergist at Children's who could have done allergy testing but I am honestly relieved they recommended against it and to treat her with nasal spray and over the counter claritin. They said you can kind of tell what she is allergic to if you pay attention. There are a few extra things I need to do in regards to her allergies, like an air purifier for her room and brushing the dog more, but other than that I have most of it right already. I knew what to do since being an allergy kid myself. So I was super happy with the results and answers we got. We follow up in a month again to see how it is working out with the meds. After our appointment yesterday we came home and went to lunch, then BJ's, then Rita's on the way home since Belle did so well. So we were not home until 2pm or around there. She and I spent the evening just us because Paul went out with his mom. She went to bed perfect! I was so relieved and happy! Bedtime routine is a work in progress though. Some nights are good and some horrible. I think it has to do with her not resting well and just her age. So I keep telling myself "This too shall pass".

We did make one extra stop on the way home and that was at the cemetery. Yesterday was the anniversary of my dad's passing as well. So I stopped for just a few minutes to visit. It was really the only chance I had and took to be sad and miss him. I honestly coped by blocking it out and focusing on the things I had to do and taking care of Belle. I do miss him terribly though and it is hard because I think about things he would say or what I would like for him to say about my life. I wonder if I would make him proud and his thoughts on our adoption. I imagine what he would say, but what I am finding is that I am filling in the blanks not really knowing if those would be his responses. It makes me feel as though he is slipping away and I cannot really "hear" him anymore where it concerns the important things in my life. What I definitely can still hear is the silly things I KNOW he would say and jokes he would tell. Those things bring smiles to me and fond memories of him. I just wish sometimes I could know what he thinks of what I have made of myself, and the plans I have for myself and my family. I am sure he would be proud of me no matter what, he always was, and he was super proud to be a grandpa. That makes me sad that Belle will never know him personally, but sadly all I can do is tell her about him. Sorry for the down stuff, but this is my way of getting it out without sitting and crying or just being  mopey. I love and miss my dad and always will. No one will ever be like him or fill that void.

So today I got someone to cover my shift from 7-3 so I could take Belle to the Otolaryngologist (ENT) at Georgetown. I wanted her to see the tonsil immune specialist and today was the only day. So again we left super early. Yesterday at 0540 and today 0740. So not super early but still early for her. I was planning on taking the metro rail and bus, but then decided at the last minute to drive myself instead of walking and stuff in unfamiliar territory while it is raining with an unpredictable three year old that could tantrum at any moment. Love her but it is true! So everything was fine, I followed the GPS until there was a detour. And dumb me, I didn't follow the detour signs and figured the GPS would reroute me, it did, then I didn't make the turn in time or made the wrong right turn. Which making the wrong right or left turn you will only understand if you have truly driven in DC before. It is so dumb! How can you make streets that make sense and have two right turns in the same "right" turn!! Anyway, I drove and rerouted a bunch with the GPS, then got caught for some police procession or something, probably the president or something and the GPS took me in a circle twice! Dumb thing! Then almost in tears I asked the cop how to get to Georgetown, he told me a way, but I followed the GPS. His way was probably quicker. And I almost caused an accident at least once, because I had to push my way into traffic. God is good for keeping us safe! And praying I didn't get any speed or "just through the yellow light" cameras! :-/  So finally we made it to Georgetown and I had to find the right building and parking. Found it and we were supposed to be there at 0930 for paperwork with her appointment at 1000. But we got there and parked and walking by 0945. So I asked someone with a badge where the building was and she walked us to the building with directions from there. We got there at 0955! I was so relieved though and the secretary was so nice! She told me it was fine when I apologized and told her we got lost, then I asked about the bathroom because I had to go! She told me and when we came out, it was time for us to go back. She saw Dr. Harley. He is quiet but nice. He got her history and checked her out. So after telling him all of it, he said she will most likely need a tonsillectomy and adniodectomy but to determine if she needs it truly first we will do a sleep study to see if she is having apnea. With all the symptoms though that I told him she probably is. So I called and scheduled that at Georgetown for the 26th. Belle and I will spend the night. After her appointment I got directions to Georgetown cupcake. We went and got a bunch of cupcakes and then headed home finally! Almost noon before we headed home. Got turned around again and went the wrong way at least twice, but finally made it to 95/495 and I was good! I had a killer headache though from driving and hunger. We stopped and got lunch, and met my mom for a bit. Also heard from the charge nurse at work asking if I wanted paid on call. I said yes please!! I am so tired! So thankfully I did not have to work today. We didn't get home until almost 3 either. I let Belle watch a movie while I rested and then I let her have half of her cupcake and we played and cleaned up some. So in a nutshell I am super happy with all the doctors and responses I have gotten. No one wants to do anything unnecessary, testing that may or may not show anything, and no one wants to jump to surgery right away. So I am one happy patients momma!

That is all for now, I will post more later. Not much else is going on,  just working now.