Today was pretty good. I am tired but I did get a lot accomplished! I planted my blueberry, raspberry, and butterfly bushes, did dishes, took pictures and posted to yardsale site, washed linens, cleaned bathrooms, made two phone calls, and printed our stuff for our cruise! Oh and Belle and I went and got our bangs cut. She had her first hair cut today! She looks so cute too!
The one phone call I made was about the letter from my doctor about my health for the adoption. I got an e-mail asking for more detailed information regarding my medical stuff, the fact we are upside down on our mortgage and my history with my father. So hopefully I'll get the letter soon and be able to forward it.
While I was doing stuff on the computer I had Belle lay down for a nap. I heard her play for a while and then it was quiet. I went to check on her and didn't see her in her bed or the floor. I began to think where could she be she couldn't get out. That's when I saw her curled up in a ball in her bitty baby crib! She was so funny and cute! I put her in her bed and had to sit with her for a few minutes and I don't think she went back to sleep but she rested. Next time I'll leave her in the baby crib.
Anyway, time for bed!
Monday, April 30, 2012
Sunday, April 29, 2012
The weekend
So I haven't been on in a few days because it has been crazy! I worked Thursday and Friday and things were busy! It was just steady busy with people in labor. I was so tired. Friday night we got stuff ready for our yard sale we had Saturday. All of the proceeds from the yard and bake sale we had went toward our adoption. It was a cold and cloudy day, so it wasn't the best and I didn't price anything out, so it could have been done better, but we still made $133! I was actually surprised when I totaled it up because we really didn't sell many big items and we still had baked goods left over! I am planning to sell the bigger stuff and maybe group stuff together and sell it online.
Today we went to church and I am glad we did because I woke up sad and feeling sorry for myself. But once I started worshiping God I started to feel better and I realized that I am vulnerable right now, so the devil is taking advantage of me and putting thoughts into my head. I am vulnerable because I am tired, have PMS, and I am grieving my dad and my grandmother. My grandmother passed away 10 years ago on May 1, in relation to the LaPlata, MD tornado. She had an asthma attack during the tornado and they were able to resuscitate her but she had no brain activity when they did the EEG. I was very close with her and I like to think that I am a lot like her. She was a great woman who loved God and cared about people. She taught me when I was young to say sorry when people are sick or sad. She didn't tell me to do that but she said it to me and in that she taught me compassion for others. I still say that to this day if someone is sad or sick, I am sorry because I don't want them to be sad or sick.
Anyway, the rest of our day was good. Paul had mentioned on the way to church wanting to make our yard look more presentable so we stopped at the nursery on our way home and picked out some stuff. We are both happy with the way it will look. And he started working right away and Belle was outside "helping" ! I stayed inside and cleaned. And I think I have decided that I am going to try making my own laundry detergent, stain remover, household cleaner, and buy locally grown produce, and local eggs. I am hoping that through this that I can save us some money. And be more earth friendly and non-toxic for Belle.
Today we went to church and I am glad we did because I woke up sad and feeling sorry for myself. But once I started worshiping God I started to feel better and I realized that I am vulnerable right now, so the devil is taking advantage of me and putting thoughts into my head. I am vulnerable because I am tired, have PMS, and I am grieving my dad and my grandmother. My grandmother passed away 10 years ago on May 1, in relation to the LaPlata, MD tornado. She had an asthma attack during the tornado and they were able to resuscitate her but she had no brain activity when they did the EEG. I was very close with her and I like to think that I am a lot like her. She was a great woman who loved God and cared about people. She taught me when I was young to say sorry when people are sick or sad. She didn't tell me to do that but she said it to me and in that she taught me compassion for others. I still say that to this day if someone is sad or sick, I am sorry because I don't want them to be sad or sick.
Anyway, the rest of our day was good. Paul had mentioned on the way to church wanting to make our yard look more presentable so we stopped at the nursery on our way home and picked out some stuff. We are both happy with the way it will look. And he started working right away and Belle was outside "helping" ! I stayed inside and cleaned. And I think I have decided that I am going to try making my own laundry detergent, stain remover, household cleaner, and buy locally grown produce, and local eggs. I am hoping that through this that I can save us some money. And be more earth friendly and non-toxic for Belle.
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Feeling attacked
So today was a little rough. Belle has been waking up at night either 2am or like today it was 5 am. I am very blessed because Paul gets up with her most of the time. She still wakes up about 7:30am even if she has been up crying. Today was no different except she woke up screaming and when I went to get her she didn't calm down. She still screamed and cried for "mommy and daddy". It was really strange, I told her I was right there but it was like it didn't register with her. I assume she is having nightmares. So this morning she was whiny, cranky, and just irritable. We still went to gymnastics, which was the last class. She had a good time and then I stopped by my friend's house to work on my adoption quilt design. She was okay there until we left she acted really tired. So on the way home I kept her awake so she would sleep after lunch. She ate lunch, and then for the next hour or so I tried to get her to go to sleep. Over and over again, I asked her what she wanted. I told her it was quiet time and she said "No". I left her in her room for a while but she was screaming and I was afraid she would get destructive again, so I didn't leave her like that. Then I tried sitting with her and rubbing her back and talking soothingly like my mom suggested, that also was a no go. Finally she calmed down and played quietly after I left again. But never slept so after about half an hour, I got her out again and took her outside. Throughout this she tried playing with my face, kicking me, and putting her feet in my face. By the time I took her outside I called Paul at my wits end because honestly I needed some time too! And at that point I was also feeling like a bad mom for letting her cry some, and for being angry and yelling at her some. Paul told me that was Satan attacking me and that I am a good mom. Once she was done playing we came inside and I let her watch "Little Einsteins" while I did stuff on the computer. On top of all that I did get laundry and dishes done. And this evening we ran errands together. We returned spray paint, bought duct tape, groceries, stopped at the bank, and returned books to the library. The only thing I didn't get done was posting the signs for our yard sale on Saturday. Paul said he will do that though.
At this point it is supposed to rain on Saturday, but we will be there selling rain or shine. I am praying though that it doesn't rain. And as I folded laundry tonight and even right now I am listening to Pandora Christian Rock radio. It is totally helping me feel better. The Reese cups that Paul bought me won't hurt either! And I have a great friend who is giving me clothes for Belle and told me to put the money I would normally give her toward the adoption. I really am so blessed! And I am trusting that God will provide us the money. I am also praying that he provides me with patience with Belle and our other little girl. Today I felt like I wasn't even sure if I could handle another child, or deserved another child. Paul told me that is what makes me a good mom that I even think about those things. Paul is so good to me, he talked to me every time I called today and he came right home and is mowing the lawn in the dark because it needs to be done.
I can handle things and I am not going to let sadness or Satan take hold of me and win! I am strong and God will never give me anything I cannot handle! God help me to remember these things through this process, protect me from evil thoughts toward myself and others. And please help me to have patience with Belle and understand her. And help her to know that I love her more than anything. Bless Paul and thank you for him and please bless our finances for this adoption. Amen
At this point it is supposed to rain on Saturday, but we will be there selling rain or shine. I am praying though that it doesn't rain. And as I folded laundry tonight and even right now I am listening to Pandora Christian Rock radio. It is totally helping me feel better. The Reese cups that Paul bought me won't hurt either! And I have a great friend who is giving me clothes for Belle and told me to put the money I would normally give her toward the adoption. I really am so blessed! And I am trusting that God will provide us the money. I am also praying that he provides me with patience with Belle and our other little girl. Today I felt like I wasn't even sure if I could handle another child, or deserved another child. Paul told me that is what makes me a good mom that I even think about those things. Paul is so good to me, he talked to me every time I called today and he came right home and is mowing the lawn in the dark because it needs to be done.
I can handle things and I am not going to let sadness or Satan take hold of me and win! I am strong and God will never give me anything I cannot handle! God help me to remember these things through this process, protect me from evil thoughts toward myself and others. And please help me to have patience with Belle and understand her. And help her to know that I love her more than anything. Bless Paul and thank you for him and please bless our finances for this adoption. Amen
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Adoption
So we just submitted our application for our little girl from Ethiopia and I am totally freaked out! I know it's dumb and I have been talking about doing this but I am in shock because I feel like I just committed us to spending 30 thousand plus dollars! And where do we come up with that money! As I am typing though I am calming down and remembering that God is in control and this is His will. He wants us to do this so He will provide. I am excited at the same time, I can't believe we are going to have another little girl! I can't wait!
Now we are going to do fundraising. This Saturday is our first yard and bake sale. I am worried though that we won't sell all of the stuff! We have decided though to sell the baby stuff too. They were gifts but what better way to use gifts that people gave us to get money to get our other little girl! I will sell them later though because I don't feel like I can part quite yet. The other thing I am doing is getting addresses to mail letters. I will also be starting a flower bulb sale, t-shirt sale, quilt auction, and possibly a dinner! A lot to do, but it will be so worth it!
The other thing I was thinking about just last night was that we need to get our foundation checked and I start to panic a little when I think about that and having to pay someone to look at that while going through the adoption costs. Our house sinks in the middle and Paul thinks we need the middle of the house lifted. We may it does dip quite a bit. I hope we can find someone to do this for a reasonable price. I guess it's time to pray about it!
About today, I worked. It was a good day, I took care of some really nice people. And I read my parenting book "Love and Logic" at lunch.
Now we are going to do fundraising. This Saturday is our first yard and bake sale. I am worried though that we won't sell all of the stuff! We have decided though to sell the baby stuff too. They were gifts but what better way to use gifts that people gave us to get money to get our other little girl! I will sell them later though because I don't feel like I can part quite yet. The other thing I am doing is getting addresses to mail letters. I will also be starting a flower bulb sale, t-shirt sale, quilt auction, and possibly a dinner! A lot to do, but it will be so worth it!
The other thing I was thinking about just last night was that we need to get our foundation checked and I start to panic a little when I think about that and having to pay someone to look at that while going through the adoption costs. Our house sinks in the middle and Paul thinks we need the middle of the house lifted. We may it does dip quite a bit. I hope we can find someone to do this for a reasonable price. I guess it's time to pray about it!
About today, I worked. It was a good day, I took care of some really nice people. And I read my parenting book "Love and Logic" at lunch.
Monday, April 23, 2012
Last two days
So the last two days have been pretty good, other than being tired. Yesterday church was good, and then had a great time with mom shopping and getting stuff for the cruise. It was my birthday present and time with her. We decided though that we can't do that except maybe once a year because we are bad for each other when shopping! As in we spend too much money when with each other! We had a good time though. And small group was great! I love our group and couldn't ask for better friends!
Today was pretty decent. Belle had a make up gymnastics class I had a dentist appointment this evening. After her gymnastics she was acting tired, so I tried to lay her down for quiet time and she just played, so after she made some extra noise I went in and asked her if she wanted to stay in her room for quiet time or snuggle with mommy. She of course said snuggle with mommy and then asked for a movie. She picked out The Lion King and we watched it in my bed together, though I closed my eyes through most of it. And in the process of watching a movie in our room again, I decided the next time a dvd player is on sale again, I am buying it because we are currently using a PS2 that has some problems reading discs. Anyway, I figured Belle would drift off during the movie. Well I was totally wrong! She fell asleep right after! I got dinner started which turned out different too. I was going to do a crock pot roast but the roast was too big and I didn't have foil to put on top of the roast for the oven, so the outer layer is a little crispy. And I got stuff ready for the yard and bake sale on Saturday. I got our taxes so we can finish the adoption application and then got my bite adjusted at the dentist again. Hopefully I will not have to go back to the dentist for this tooth again.
As for the yard sale, I am excited and nervous at the same time. I am worried we won't sell anything or won't make much money. I worry that we won't sell stuff and then we will be left with stuff to store still! I am trying to trust God to provide. And I found out yesterday from friends that we can "kill two birds with one stone" by doing our home study and dossier at the same time. The only thing that means is that there will be more money due sooner. That scares the crap out of me because we don't have that kind of money. And I think it will be more effective to call the church and ask about the fundraising I want to do rather than e-mail. So I have to add that to my list, and I also have to call the film crew about my video for work.
Anyway, I guess that's enough for today. Going to work in the morning. Goodnight!
Today was pretty decent. Belle had a make up gymnastics class I had a dentist appointment this evening. After her gymnastics she was acting tired, so I tried to lay her down for quiet time and she just played, so after she made some extra noise I went in and asked her if she wanted to stay in her room for quiet time or snuggle with mommy. She of course said snuggle with mommy and then asked for a movie. She picked out The Lion King and we watched it in my bed together, though I closed my eyes through most of it. And in the process of watching a movie in our room again, I decided the next time a dvd player is on sale again, I am buying it because we are currently using a PS2 that has some problems reading discs. Anyway, I figured Belle would drift off during the movie. Well I was totally wrong! She fell asleep right after! I got dinner started which turned out different too. I was going to do a crock pot roast but the roast was too big and I didn't have foil to put on top of the roast for the oven, so the outer layer is a little crispy. And I got stuff ready for the yard and bake sale on Saturday. I got our taxes so we can finish the adoption application and then got my bite adjusted at the dentist again. Hopefully I will not have to go back to the dentist for this tooth again.
As for the yard sale, I am excited and nervous at the same time. I am worried we won't sell anything or won't make much money. I worry that we won't sell stuff and then we will be left with stuff to store still! I am trying to trust God to provide. And I found out yesterday from friends that we can "kill two birds with one stone" by doing our home study and dossier at the same time. The only thing that means is that there will be more money due sooner. That scares the crap out of me because we don't have that kind of money. And I think it will be more effective to call the church and ask about the fundraising I want to do rather than e-mail. So I have to add that to my list, and I also have to call the film crew about my video for work.
Anyway, I guess that's enough for today. Going to work in the morning. Goodnight!
Saturday, April 21, 2012
Losing items, losing my mind!
Well last night ended up being a late night. We got home late from a friends house. All was well when we went to bed until 1230 am. Belle woke up three times! Paul luckily went in all three times. The first time he brought her to our bed and she snuggled right up to me which I love except she didn't go to sleep. Instead she tossed and turned and then started talking. He took he back to bed and then the last time she woke up was 0230. I kind of yelled at Paul to rub her back and let me sleep! Apology was made and accepted this morning.
So off to work at 0615. Work was good. I had a great delivery with a great couple. The only thing was that after the delivery we lost a few things. Nothing left in the patient or anything but lost a paper and such. The worst lost item is needed and costs money to replace! My badge!! I even dug through nasty, bloody trash and linen twice! Still didn't find it, so I may be buying a new badge and I will not be buying a nice badge holder again. Lesson learned! My day did get a little busy and I did and am questioning a coworkers attitude, bossiness, and lack of assistance. When you are the one judging whether someone else is helpful and such, you don't not be helpful yourself. And you don't yell at people to do something that was your responsibility in the first place. You ask for help, don't demand it. Okay I've said my peace and I'm getting off my soap box.
Last but not least, as I was leaving work I was talking to someone outside about our adoption. And telling her that we don't have the money but I am trusting God to rain it down. Well it has been raining and was still cloudy so I was kind of making a pun as I looked up to the sky and wouldn't you know it started to rain again!! God totally has a sense of humor! So I took that as my sign that He will provide it! And only have a couple more things to do on our application and we are started!! Nervous and excited at the same time!
So off to work at 0615. Work was good. I had a great delivery with a great couple. The only thing was that after the delivery we lost a few things. Nothing left in the patient or anything but lost a paper and such. The worst lost item is needed and costs money to replace! My badge!! I even dug through nasty, bloody trash and linen twice! Still didn't find it, so I may be buying a new badge and I will not be buying a nice badge holder again. Lesson learned! My day did get a little busy and I did and am questioning a coworkers attitude, bossiness, and lack of assistance. When you are the one judging whether someone else is helpful and such, you don't not be helpful yourself. And you don't yell at people to do something that was your responsibility in the first place. You ask for help, don't demand it. Okay I've said my peace and I'm getting off my soap box.
Last but not least, as I was leaving work I was talking to someone outside about our adoption. And telling her that we don't have the money but I am trusting God to rain it down. Well it has been raining and was still cloudy so I was kind of making a pun as I looked up to the sky and wouldn't you know it started to rain again!! God totally has a sense of humor! So I took that as my sign that He will provide it! And only have a couple more things to do on our application and we are started!! Nervous and excited at the same time!
Friday, April 20, 2012
Birthday make up
So yesterday I worked. Work was good. Steady busy. I had a nice delivery within an hour of starting my shift so it started out right! I had a lot of in and out patients though and then attended another delivery. There were complications but it went well! After I got home and put Belle to bed Paul got home. He bought Belle and I both gifts! He felt so bad about my birthday and everything he bought me a necklace with a diamond pendant. He bought Belle a "pandora" like bracelet with a hello kitty charm! So cute!
Today has been okay except trying to institute new parenting skills. I went to the cardiologist and got labs and an echocardiogram ordered. The echo will be in June. The labs when I can. I also asked him to write a letter about my health status for the adoption. He said he would do that today and mail it to me! I forgot to ask him a few questions though. I'll either call or wait till next time.
I am trying this new parenting technique called "love and logic". It focuses on giving children reasonable choices that don't affect others so they feel in control of something. Even though you really are in control. And if they don't decide in 10 seconds you make the choice. The other thing I've learned so far is to show empathy when disciplining. Telling them you are sad because they can't have their toys because they didn't listen. Things like that. It sounds easy but it's not. And the other thing is that showing anger shuts them down and then they don't listen and you both gets even more upset. It's hard not to get upset though!
Tonight I am doing some shopping and then going to friends' for dinner.
Today has been okay except trying to institute new parenting skills. I went to the cardiologist and got labs and an echocardiogram ordered. The echo will be in June. The labs when I can. I also asked him to write a letter about my health status for the adoption. He said he would do that today and mail it to me! I forgot to ask him a few questions though. I'll either call or wait till next time.
I am trying this new parenting technique called "love and logic". It focuses on giving children reasonable choices that don't affect others so they feel in control of something. Even though you really are in control. And if they don't decide in 10 seconds you make the choice. The other thing I've learned so far is to show empathy when disciplining. Telling them you are sad because they can't have their toys because they didn't listen. Things like that. It sounds easy but it's not. And the other thing is that showing anger shuts them down and then they don't listen and you both gets even more upset. It's hard not to get upset though!
Tonight I am doing some shopping and then going to friends' for dinner.
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Birthday and day with my girl
Yesterday was my birthday. I worked 12 hours, it wasn't bad, just steady busy. And I did get a lot of birthday wishes. Though the first birthday wish I thought I would get I didn't. Paul forgot until he wrote the date on a check. I tried not to get too upset about it, but then he got home late, and didn't do anything extra or special. I know I am complaining. It just hurt my feelings. He is a good man and husband, but I just want to be number one, which means before work.
Today I considered going to the mall and going shopping, but instead I stayed home and got laundry and other things done around the house. I also went grocery shopping and some other errands. The worst errand I did was filling up my SUV with gas. I paid $4.07/gallon for plus at Wawa. It totaled to $73! I have decided that I am going to have to become a hermit, because gas is too expensive and Paul is going to have to drive us around on Sundays!
I am working on adoption stuff tonight too. I have written my adoption letter and made it known of Facebook. Because you know nothing is official until it's posted on Facebook! I am going to make a list of people to send our letter to, and Paul will help me address them. I also posted our yard sale and bake sale for next weekend on the yard sale website.
Last but not least I am waiting for Paul to get home. He apparently had to work late. He left 3 hours late. This is not cool! Especially after last night. I already ate dinner with Belle and I am still not going to do the dishes. He can do that! I am going to eat my Cold Stone Creamery and then go to bed!
Today I considered going to the mall and going shopping, but instead I stayed home and got laundry and other things done around the house. I also went grocery shopping and some other errands. The worst errand I did was filling up my SUV with gas. I paid $4.07/gallon for plus at Wawa. It totaled to $73! I have decided that I am going to have to become a hermit, because gas is too expensive and Paul is going to have to drive us around on Sundays!
I am working on adoption stuff tonight too. I have written my adoption letter and made it known of Facebook. Because you know nothing is official until it's posted on Facebook! I am going to make a list of people to send our letter to, and Paul will help me address them. I also posted our yard sale and bake sale for next weekend on the yard sale website.
Last but not least I am waiting for Paul to get home. He apparently had to work late. He left 3 hours late. This is not cool! Especially after last night. I already ate dinner with Belle and I am still not going to do the dishes. He can do that! I am going to eat my Cold Stone Creamery and then go to bed!
Monday, April 16, 2012
Long week and rough start to a new one.
Last week was so long and busy. That's why I haven't been on. Work was busy on Tuesday and Thursday was extremely busy too. Friday was fine but by then I was exhausted! Wednesday I barely remember! I took Belle to gymnastics and then in the afternoon Paul and I met up and finalized our wills. Then we went to our friends house for dinner. They are in the process of adopting two children from China. So we were getting advice and ideas from them. And my friend is so sweet! She made Ethiopian food for us! It was good too! Then on Saturday we took Belle to the national zoo for the first time. It was busy but good and we had fun! Belle liked it and got to see the animals she likes. Then Sunday Paul and I went to check out a car he liked. We didn't get it because we would be paying payments on a car that needs some work. So we are waiting until my car is paid off to get him one he will really like and not settle for. Then we had small group which was good.
I have officially started telling people about the adoption too. I am not caring what people think either. Some people have a bad attitude about it saying why not in the US? And they just don't understand that this is what God has called us to.
I didn't get much sleep over the weekend so I am tired, have a headache, and cranky today. I also think I am grieving a little for my dad. He passed away almost two years ago and I just miss him. It doesn't feel like it's been that long and I just miss him in general. I also found out Saturday that a dear friend passed away. And it is almost the 10 year anniversary since my grandmother passed away as well. I just miss all these people. And so I don't feel like cleaning or anything. I did which is good and will usually make me feel better but not today. And Belle is being a little challenging. She kicks me when I change her diapers and just doesn't want to listen. I should take a walk too since the weather is nice but I really don't want to. Which makes me feel fat too. I know I'm not fat but it makes me feel bad and I don't know that it would make me feel any better either, unless it was me by myself. Prayers would be great!
I have officially started telling people about the adoption too. I am not caring what people think either. Some people have a bad attitude about it saying why not in the US? And they just don't understand that this is what God has called us to.
I didn't get much sleep over the weekend so I am tired, have a headache, and cranky today. I also think I am grieving a little for my dad. He passed away almost two years ago and I just miss him. It doesn't feel like it's been that long and I just miss him in general. I also found out Saturday that a dear friend passed away. And it is almost the 10 year anniversary since my grandmother passed away as well. I just miss all these people. And so I don't feel like cleaning or anything. I did which is good and will usually make me feel better but not today. And Belle is being a little challenging. She kicks me when I change her diapers and just doesn't want to listen. I should take a walk too since the weather is nice but I really don't want to. Which makes me feel fat too. I know I'm not fat but it makes me feel bad and I don't know that it would make me feel any better either, unless it was me by myself. Prayers would be great!
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Interesting
I had an interesting day to say the least. I worked 12 hours on the mother-baby side. It wasn't too bad but busy enough. The interesting part is that I found out my father has a life changing, ultimately terminal illness. Though not surprising, it was an awkward feeling hearing it and knowing that what I had been saying he has was true. Then I was battling my feelings of whether I should see him or not, and whether I should let him meet Belle. I came to the conclusion to see him before I left work, and tell him that I truly do forgive him, because in all reality he could be dying. So I told him to look at me and I told him that I forgive him and wouldn't wish anything bad on him. He looks really sick. He weighs 113lbs. I told him that I would pray for him and to let me know what the doctors and such say. So for right now I guess I will be answering the phone when he calls. All of this knowledge happened while I was at work, so I got a little distracted and discombobulated. Not that it affected my care with my patients.
The second thing is also sad, I found out through facebook a friend of mine is really sick and in ICU. She has been sick for a long time, but has turned for the worse and doctors are telling family to think the worst. She is a wonderful woman who devoted her time to family, friends, and helping mother's in need through pregnancy care centers and helping mother's to choose life for their unborn children. So please pray for her.
Belle apparently had a good day, and went to bed fine tonight without her paci!! Also Paul turned 28 today. And Paul didn't get his steak dinner, but got Chick-Fil-A on the way home and didn't get me any!! Instead I got Popeyes. And I got to catch up with a friend who is going to adopt as well, and talk about it. That was one of the best parts and tomorrow night will be spent with friends talking about adoption!
The second thing is also sad, I found out through facebook a friend of mine is really sick and in ICU. She has been sick for a long time, but has turned for the worse and doctors are telling family to think the worst. She is a wonderful woman who devoted her time to family, friends, and helping mother's in need through pregnancy care centers and helping mother's to choose life for their unborn children. So please pray for her.
Belle apparently had a good day, and went to bed fine tonight without her paci!! Also Paul turned 28 today. And Paul didn't get his steak dinner, but got Chick-Fil-A on the way home and didn't get me any!! Instead I got Popeyes. And I got to catch up with a friend who is going to adopt as well, and talk about it. That was one of the best parts and tomorrow night will be spent with friends talking about adoption!
Monday, April 9, 2012
Day as a mommy
So today I guess you could call a boring mommy day. I didn't go anywhere, I stayed home and took care of Belle and cleaned, did laundry, played with her, took a walk, and made phone calls. The only interesting thing that happened today was my phone call with the adoption agency. The first part of the process will take only 2-3 months, and I found out they don't normally have people do payments incrementally so it's not as much of a hit financially. Nut they could do it on a case by case basis.
This morning Belle woke up at 5:20 and slept in our bed until 6:30. After that she was up. She was up until 11:30. Although I did try to put her down around 9ish, but we got rid of the pacifier today, so nap time didn't happen until I saw her nodding off a lunch. Nap time was easier because she didn't cry long, and went to sleep within minutes. Unfortunately bedtime has been harder. Lots of screaming and crying for either one of us. She screamed and cried for about 1/2 hour, but is at least quiet now if not asleep. I feel bad but the doctor said to take it away now. I also have changed what I am doing for her with nap time. If she doesn't sleep in the first 30 min and she is still crying then we wait or put up a gate and have quiet time. She sleeps with the door closed, and always has. The doctor said you can't lock a child in a room, and I took the door knob cover off, but the other day when my mother-in-law put her down with the door open and the gate up Belle cried and then shut the door herself and went to sleep. So I guess we will do what works for us.
Paul and I were planning on going to look at/buy a car on Wednesday but the car sold today. And the other car we liked is in Baltimore, and I refuse to drive in rush hour traffic for a dumb car. We don't need it! And he called about loan stuff today and he was inclined to get the credit union credit card and use that, but that makes me too nervous. The money is too available, and he has in the past made bad decisions with credit cards. I am feeling like we need to stop looking and leave it be, God will bring us the right car, for the right price, at the right time. He just needs to stop obsessing and come to terms with waiting on God. And I don't know how good of an idea it is with the adoption stuff anyway.
That was my boring day as a mommy and wife. Tomorrow will be work, which should be interesting to say the least!
This morning Belle woke up at 5:20 and slept in our bed until 6:30. After that she was up. She was up until 11:30. Although I did try to put her down around 9ish, but we got rid of the pacifier today, so nap time didn't happen until I saw her nodding off a lunch. Nap time was easier because she didn't cry long, and went to sleep within minutes. Unfortunately bedtime has been harder. Lots of screaming and crying for either one of us. She screamed and cried for about 1/2 hour, but is at least quiet now if not asleep. I feel bad but the doctor said to take it away now. I also have changed what I am doing for her with nap time. If she doesn't sleep in the first 30 min and she is still crying then we wait or put up a gate and have quiet time. She sleeps with the door closed, and always has. The doctor said you can't lock a child in a room, and I took the door knob cover off, but the other day when my mother-in-law put her down with the door open and the gate up Belle cried and then shut the door herself and went to sleep. So I guess we will do what works for us.
Paul and I were planning on going to look at/buy a car on Wednesday but the car sold today. And the other car we liked is in Baltimore, and I refuse to drive in rush hour traffic for a dumb car. We don't need it! And he called about loan stuff today and he was inclined to get the credit union credit card and use that, but that makes me too nervous. The money is too available, and he has in the past made bad decisions with credit cards. I am feeling like we need to stop looking and leave it be, God will bring us the right car, for the right price, at the right time. He just needs to stop obsessing and come to terms with waiting on God. And I don't know how good of an idea it is with the adoption stuff anyway.
That was my boring day as a mommy and wife. Tomorrow will be work, which should be interesting to say the least!
Sunday, April 8, 2012
He is Risen!!
Happy Easter to all! Today was a good day. Church was good, pastor talked about bridging the gap. We all have a gap between us and God and to bridge that gap you have to A: accept Christ as your personal Savior, B: Believe He died on the cross for your sins, and C:Confess that you are not perfect and ask for forgiveness. To some out there this may seem stupid or some may ask why. Why be a Christian? Well, I can tell you that I am not only a christian because I want/will go to heaven, but also because my life is fulfilled with Him in my life. You don't necessarily realize what God can do and how He can take care of you until you let Him. God loves you, He created you for a purpose, and He has a plan for you if you let Him work in your life.
There are a few ways God has been there for me. From the beginning though, I received Christ as my savior at age 9 in class in 3rd grade at my new christian school. When I was two my parents divorced because my father was physically, mentally, and emotionally abusive to my mother. After that my father had visitation rights every other weekend, like every other most common child from divorce. Anyway, my father was not kind. I remember as a little kid, him forcing me to nap with him, and forcing me to eat when I was full. Little things like that. As I got older and became a "tweener", things changed, he would tell me that I was getting fat. He would drive fast and scare me purposefully, he would "play" and hurt me. I also watched him hurt my stepmother, and one night even choke my step-brother. That same night earlier, he was "playing: and gave me an "indian burn" which sprained my wrist. I am also an asthmatic, which the disease is under control now, but as a child it wasn't. There was a time when he refused to let me get my inhaler, and told me I didn't have asthma. He would blow smoke into my face, and at one point took away my bed and gave it to my sister. So I had to sleep on the couch or the floor. Ever since I can remember, I have always felt that I don't love him as my father. I was afraid of him as a child so I would lie and say it anyway. I prayed to God about this for a long time and prayed for the strength to stand up to him and tell him how I felt and that I didn't want to see him anymore. At some points I had even had thoughts of jumping out of a moving car to get away from him. Occasionally he would have nice days, and he would try to bribe me into liking him. This particular day he picked me up and we got slurpees. It was around his birthday and on the way to the house he asked me if I got him anything, I said no that I didn't have any money. Then he said that my mom could have given some of the child support to me to spend. He then went on and asked if I got Clint (my step-dad, whom I consider my dad) anything for his birthday. I said yes but that I didn't pay for it. Then he asked about father's day, I told him well I colored you a picture. He asked the same thing about my dad (Clint). And the answer was yes. Then he said do you love Clint? I said yes. He said, Do you love me? I said no. And that was the beginning of the end of my relationship with my father. He verbally abused me for 2 1/2 days straight. I cried most of the weekend, and he told me things that I had no business as an 11 year old knowing. When my mom picked me up that Sunday, my eyes were so red and swollen. I was thankful however for my step-mom because she did tell him to just leave me alone. The next year was hard, but I got through it. My asthma got really bad that year and everyone at his house smoked, so every time I was there I started having asthma attacks,. I had to leave within hours of being there. After a few times of that, he started taking me to work with him, so I couldn't leave. We never really talked. By The next Christmas after I told him I didn't love him I had the nerve to tell him I wanted to stay home. And in a course over two months, I told him I didn't want to go. He showed up at the house to pick me up a few times, and I said I was staying home. Then he would call and ask and eventually he stopped even calling. That was February, and I turned 13 in April. I also wrote a letter to the family court judge telling her that I didn't want to go and the reasons why and things he had done and I had seen. He got a copy of the letter, so he never fought. I have seen him very few times since. At one point I tried to be part of that side of the family, but no one really accepted me. So I don't talk to anyone except every few years or so. My grandmother always treated me different because of my mom and she always tried to tell me that the Bible says that you have to love your father, but that's not true. The Bible says Honor, do not disobey. I kept that commandment. I talk to my father every once and a while, but it is always strained. I am telling this story because the only reason I am a sane person and had the strength at 13 to do what I did is because God was there with me. God is the one that spoke for me and answered my many prayers. And the other thing out of all of this, is that I do not harbor hard feelings toward him. I recently found out he is in poor health and I feel sorry for him. He wants to meet Belle and I had decided not to because of my past with him and that he is a pathological liar. But if he really is sick and dying I probably will let him meet her. She is his first grandchild and I am compassionate toward him. He has no one now. All of my siblings dislike him, he is divorced from my step-mother and takes care of my sick grandmother. The only reason I do not hold a grudge is because God has given me the strength to forgive him. And I am a happier person because of it.
The other major thing in my life that God has gotten my through is postpartum anxiety and depression. After Belle was born things were good. I was happy and everything was good with our new family. My dad (Clint) was okay....he didn't like going to the doctor and stuff. He had some issues, but nothing that I thought would end the way it did. Belle was 5 weeks old when he died. He died May 6, 2010 at home. My sister went to class to take her final and when she got home he was gone. She called me in a panic, and I called 911 for her. The attempted CPR but he had been gone for a while. So this was obviously unexpected. What made it hard was that he loved Belle so much. He would have done anything for her. He called her Izzy. He was the only one that did. I wasn't ready to lose him, none of us were and so soon after something so happy and exciting in our lives. I was sad all the time, and I felt like people didn't notice or care that I was grieving. And at the same time as if grieving is not enough, I was learning how to be a mom, wife, work, and try to help my mom. She was 48 when he died. I don't remember much of that summer at all. It is all a blur. I think some people could tell something was wrong, but in my mind people didn't notice. I started counseling in July. After about a month and a half, my counselor recommended that I talk to my doctor about medication for postpartum depression. I went on Zoloft and stayed on a small dose of that until June of 2011. I stayed in counseling until February of 2011. I saw a Christian counselor, and prayed a lot. I still have moments of anxiety and sadness but I can still find happiness and be content. I am telling you this story as well, because I don't think I could have gotten through without God. God is the one who pulled me out of the deep, dark hole that I was in and couldn't get out of by myself. Did medication help, yes. But that was only a part of it. When I told people the dose I was on, it was such a small dose that some say it might not have been effective. But it helped me to see some light, and God did the rest. Healing is still happening and currently I am missing my dad a lot. I can't believe it's been almost two years, and it doesn't seem fair that I lost my dad so early and that he never really got to know Belle. It's not fair that other people still have their dads and I don't, but God called him home. And everything happens for a reason. God never says it will be easy, but that is why he sent His only Son in human form. Jesus knew what it was like to experience hunger, thirst, physical pain, heartache, and ultimately death. He knows and He wants you to know that He does understand and He will always be with you through the good and the bad. That is why I got a tattoo of the last line of the poem of "Footprints", "It was then that I carried you", it's a picture of the beach at sunrise, with one set of footprints.
I hope this will help someone get through a tough time and maybe rely on God for a change. Even better, I hope that someone will come to know Christ as their savior through my testimony, and have peace and reassurance that God is with you, and have eternal life with Him! Peace, and God be with you in all you do!
There are a few ways God has been there for me. From the beginning though, I received Christ as my savior at age 9 in class in 3rd grade at my new christian school. When I was two my parents divorced because my father was physically, mentally, and emotionally abusive to my mother. After that my father had visitation rights every other weekend, like every other most common child from divorce. Anyway, my father was not kind. I remember as a little kid, him forcing me to nap with him, and forcing me to eat when I was full. Little things like that. As I got older and became a "tweener", things changed, he would tell me that I was getting fat. He would drive fast and scare me purposefully, he would "play" and hurt me. I also watched him hurt my stepmother, and one night even choke my step-brother. That same night earlier, he was "playing: and gave me an "indian burn" which sprained my wrist. I am also an asthmatic, which the disease is under control now, but as a child it wasn't. There was a time when he refused to let me get my inhaler, and told me I didn't have asthma. He would blow smoke into my face, and at one point took away my bed and gave it to my sister. So I had to sleep on the couch or the floor. Ever since I can remember, I have always felt that I don't love him as my father. I was afraid of him as a child so I would lie and say it anyway. I prayed to God about this for a long time and prayed for the strength to stand up to him and tell him how I felt and that I didn't want to see him anymore. At some points I had even had thoughts of jumping out of a moving car to get away from him. Occasionally he would have nice days, and he would try to bribe me into liking him. This particular day he picked me up and we got slurpees. It was around his birthday and on the way to the house he asked me if I got him anything, I said no that I didn't have any money. Then he said that my mom could have given some of the child support to me to spend. He then went on and asked if I got Clint (my step-dad, whom I consider my dad) anything for his birthday. I said yes but that I didn't pay for it. Then he asked about father's day, I told him well I colored you a picture. He asked the same thing about my dad (Clint). And the answer was yes. Then he said do you love Clint? I said yes. He said, Do you love me? I said no. And that was the beginning of the end of my relationship with my father. He verbally abused me for 2 1/2 days straight. I cried most of the weekend, and he told me things that I had no business as an 11 year old knowing. When my mom picked me up that Sunday, my eyes were so red and swollen. I was thankful however for my step-mom because she did tell him to just leave me alone. The next year was hard, but I got through it. My asthma got really bad that year and everyone at his house smoked, so every time I was there I started having asthma attacks,. I had to leave within hours of being there. After a few times of that, he started taking me to work with him, so I couldn't leave. We never really talked. By The next Christmas after I told him I didn't love him I had the nerve to tell him I wanted to stay home. And in a course over two months, I told him I didn't want to go. He showed up at the house to pick me up a few times, and I said I was staying home. Then he would call and ask and eventually he stopped even calling. That was February, and I turned 13 in April. I also wrote a letter to the family court judge telling her that I didn't want to go and the reasons why and things he had done and I had seen. He got a copy of the letter, so he never fought. I have seen him very few times since. At one point I tried to be part of that side of the family, but no one really accepted me. So I don't talk to anyone except every few years or so. My grandmother always treated me different because of my mom and she always tried to tell me that the Bible says that you have to love your father, but that's not true. The Bible says Honor, do not disobey. I kept that commandment. I talk to my father every once and a while, but it is always strained. I am telling this story because the only reason I am a sane person and had the strength at 13 to do what I did is because God was there with me. God is the one that spoke for me and answered my many prayers. And the other thing out of all of this, is that I do not harbor hard feelings toward him. I recently found out he is in poor health and I feel sorry for him. He wants to meet Belle and I had decided not to because of my past with him and that he is a pathological liar. But if he really is sick and dying I probably will let him meet her. She is his first grandchild and I am compassionate toward him. He has no one now. All of my siblings dislike him, he is divorced from my step-mother and takes care of my sick grandmother. The only reason I do not hold a grudge is because God has given me the strength to forgive him. And I am a happier person because of it.
The other major thing in my life that God has gotten my through is postpartum anxiety and depression. After Belle was born things were good. I was happy and everything was good with our new family. My dad (Clint) was okay....he didn't like going to the doctor and stuff. He had some issues, but nothing that I thought would end the way it did. Belle was 5 weeks old when he died. He died May 6, 2010 at home. My sister went to class to take her final and when she got home he was gone. She called me in a panic, and I called 911 for her. The attempted CPR but he had been gone for a while. So this was obviously unexpected. What made it hard was that he loved Belle so much. He would have done anything for her. He called her Izzy. He was the only one that did. I wasn't ready to lose him, none of us were and so soon after something so happy and exciting in our lives. I was sad all the time, and I felt like people didn't notice or care that I was grieving. And at the same time as if grieving is not enough, I was learning how to be a mom, wife, work, and try to help my mom. She was 48 when he died. I don't remember much of that summer at all. It is all a blur. I think some people could tell something was wrong, but in my mind people didn't notice. I started counseling in July. After about a month and a half, my counselor recommended that I talk to my doctor about medication for postpartum depression. I went on Zoloft and stayed on a small dose of that until June of 2011. I stayed in counseling until February of 2011. I saw a Christian counselor, and prayed a lot. I still have moments of anxiety and sadness but I can still find happiness and be content. I am telling you this story as well, because I don't think I could have gotten through without God. God is the one who pulled me out of the deep, dark hole that I was in and couldn't get out of by myself. Did medication help, yes. But that was only a part of it. When I told people the dose I was on, it was such a small dose that some say it might not have been effective. But it helped me to see some light, and God did the rest. Healing is still happening and currently I am missing my dad a lot. I can't believe it's been almost two years, and it doesn't seem fair that I lost my dad so early and that he never really got to know Belle. It's not fair that other people still have their dads and I don't, but God called him home. And everything happens for a reason. God never says it will be easy, but that is why he sent His only Son in human form. Jesus knew what it was like to experience hunger, thirst, physical pain, heartache, and ultimately death. He knows and He wants you to know that He does understand and He will always be with you through the good and the bad. That is why I got a tattoo of the last line of the poem of "Footprints", "It was then that I carried you", it's a picture of the beach at sunrise, with one set of footprints.
I hope this will help someone get through a tough time and maybe rely on God for a change. Even better, I hope that someone will come to know Christ as their savior through my testimony, and have peace and reassurance that God is with you, and have eternal life with Him! Peace, and God be with you in all you do!
Saturday, April 7, 2012
Mundane Saturday working
Obviously by my title I worked today. I had not a single patient in labor that was mine today! I helped others on the unit though get their things done. Also talked to one of my great friends and coworkers today! It was good to catch up for a bit. And I found put who got the charge nurse position and she is a friend of mine and I am happy for her. I am also really excited and happy for another friend who I found out is pregnant today!
Paul and I finally decided on a car we both like that is just an hour away and a sedan not a coupe which we had been looking at. And a lower price so hopefully it will still be available on wednesday for us to check out and maybe buy! Spent some nice time watching tv with Paul tonight and played Easter bunny for Belle web though we really haven't gone over the Easter bunny thing. I don't know that I really will, I think I would rather her think it's a fun holiday that revolves around Jesus and that she gets a gift basket because Jesus gave the ultimate gift. And I am not really into having her see the Easter bunny either. I think it's kind of a ploy to make money so all in all I think I made up my mind to not do Easter bunny.
And if I don't get a chance to post tomorrow Happy Easter to everyone put there and praise God for sending His son to die a brutal death so that we may have eternal life in His glorious home He has made for us!
Paul and I finally decided on a car we both like that is just an hour away and a sedan not a coupe which we had been looking at. And a lower price so hopefully it will still be available on wednesday for us to check out and maybe buy! Spent some nice time watching tv with Paul tonight and played Easter bunny for Belle web though we really haven't gone over the Easter bunny thing. I don't know that I really will, I think I would rather her think it's a fun holiday that revolves around Jesus and that she gets a gift basket because Jesus gave the ultimate gift. And I am not really into having her see the Easter bunny either. I think it's kind of a ploy to make money so all in all I think I made up my mind to not do Easter bunny.
And if I don't get a chance to post tomorrow Happy Easter to everyone put there and praise God for sending His son to die a brutal death so that we may have eternal life in His glorious home He has made for us!
Friday, April 6, 2012
Post Lasik
I had my Lasik surgery yesterday, it went remarkably well! I had some burning and tearing afterward, but drops helped that. And today I had my check up and I can see 20/20 in my right eye and 20/15 in my left! I have one spot on my left eye that hurts a little when it's dry but other than that all is well. I also do have a headache today, but I think it is due to lack of sleep and all the "drugs" I took yesterday.
Belle also had her two year check up today, and everything looks good! She is really smart and unfortunately I was told we need to take the paci away now, and get her to drink from a regular cup. And yesterday and today she has not napped well, but been extremely tired because she is waking up at 0615-0640. So prayers would be appreciated!
I also heard back from my director about the charge nurse position. I did not get the job, but that is obviously how God meant for it to be. She thinks I will make a good charge nurse though and to not be discouraged and apply again when a position becomes available.
Paul and I have almost definitely decided to put a deposit on the car in Pennsylvania, he clarified that we can get the money credited back if we want to finance all of it. In the long run it seems this car will cost us less money.
Paul also has not made as much money over the last few weeks, so I am praying that God takes care of us, and provides for us so that we can do this adoption.
Belle also had her two year check up today, and everything looks good! She is really smart and unfortunately I was told we need to take the paci away now, and get her to drink from a regular cup. And yesterday and today she has not napped well, but been extremely tired because she is waking up at 0615-0640. So prayers would be appreciated!
I also heard back from my director about the charge nurse position. I did not get the job, but that is obviously how God meant for it to be. She thinks I will make a good charge nurse though and to not be discouraged and apply again when a position becomes available.
Paul and I have almost definitely decided to put a deposit on the car in Pennsylvania, he clarified that we can get the money credited back if we want to finance all of it. In the long run it seems this car will cost us less money.
Paul also has not made as much money over the last few weeks, so I am praying that God takes care of us, and provides for us so that we can do this adoption.
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Sitter issues
My morning started out with getting up for work and having to go pick up the teen in the neighborhood that was supposed to watch Belle today, and after arriving I texted her, called her, knocked on the door, called her mom, and called her sister with no response. My phrase was "Oh Fudge". So I went back home because I was already running late for work, and Paul met me at the car to hand me my stuff. Belle was up and I was trying to figure out what to do on my way to work. I called my sister who didn't answer and then thought of my neighborhood daycare lady. I called her and woke her up to see if she had room for Belle today since it is spring break, I wasn't sure. Thankfully she did have room. So Paul got Belle ready and took her to daycare. I then had to call his mom and arrange for her to pick Belle up this evening. Well com to find out she wasn't feeling well, so it was up in the air half the day as to whether she could watch her for a couple hours. To top it off, my house keys were sitting on the dining room table and Paul had the spare car seat. So my mother-in-law had to drive to the hospital to get my car seat and then pick Belle up and keep her at her house. And the teen was so sorry, she cried and felt awful. She was so upset I felt bad for her.
Then Paul called basically wanting to put a $500 down payment on this car in Pennsylvania, but I wanted to do a refundable deposit. Needless to say, we are waiting till next Saturday to see if it's still available, because with the adoption stuff we cannot afford a down payment. After that was discussed he was actually okay with it!
Tomorrow I am having my Lasik eye surgery so, I most likely will not be on here, due to 24 hour restrictions. I am praying that everything goes well, I don't go blind, I am not anxious, and the valium works well. Goodnight to all! Hope everyone else out there is having a blessed day.
Then Paul called basically wanting to put a $500 down payment on this car in Pennsylvania, but I wanted to do a refundable deposit. Needless to say, we are waiting till next Saturday to see if it's still available, because with the adoption stuff we cannot afford a down payment. After that was discussed he was actually okay with it!
Tomorrow I am having my Lasik eye surgery so, I most likely will not be on here, due to 24 hour restrictions. I am praying that everything goes well, I don't go blind, I am not anxious, and the valium works well. Goodnight to all! Hope everyone else out there is having a blessed day.
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Busy day at work
Today I worked 12 hours and it was not the easiest shift. This morning was busy with deliveries inductions, and triage patients. By 5 it was good but before that was steady busy. And to top it off I got called into "the office" for more interview questions. I'm not sure if they are having trouble deciding or what but I got the distinct feeling I didn't get the position. Which greatly disappoints me and makes me sad but it will be what it will be. As one of Belle's library books that she loves right now says "you get what you get and you don't get upset." Now that I am hone I am just exhausted and ready for bed. The other issue I had today was getting my eye drops from the pharmacy. The script was sent on Friday but someone didn't check and order it so I almost didn't get my eye drops for my surgery. Thankfully they found a spare otherwise I would have had to go to great lengths to get it on top of being busy at work! And now Paul is wanting to talk about cars and get opinions and everything but I am tired and honestly don't feel like listening. I am not sure what to do about the car thing. He wants to look at a car in Pennsylvania but I think it's too far. So I just don't know. And last but not least I heard from the adoption agency today and have the go ahead for the full application. I just have to call back with my questions. Oh, and I showed of my videos of Belle dancing and singing to veggies tales. It is so cute and funny! Praying for a good nights sleep, a good day tomorrow, and that whatever happens with the charge nurse position be His will and the same with the car.
Monday, April 2, 2012
Day of rest
Today I kind of took the day off. After the busyness of last week and the weekend, I needed a day where I wasn't just running around. So I did a little laundry, took down the birthday party decorations, paid a few things, made a few phone calls. Nothing exciting. I also played with Belle outside for a while, and while we were out there our dog Lucy got out. She slid under the fence while two teens were walking by and all they did was say "Yeah, it just got out." I was irritated with them because they could have grabbed her for me, but didn't and then I had to drive up and down the road looking for her. I couldn't find her, so I then put Belle in the stroller and started on foot. And low and behold on my way back down the street the dumb dog was in the neighbors yard right behind ours! The only other exciting thing that happened was calling the adoption agency. I got clarification on when payments are due, and was told to get an even better idea on things to fill out the free pre-application. So I did and should hear back in about 3 days. I also started our real application. And we are still looking for a car, but will be waiting for God to let us know what's right. Not a very interesting day but it's my life!
Sunday, April 1, 2012
Sunday, Sunday
So yesterday we had Belle's birthday party it went great. Just the right amount of people came and she had fun. She was exhausted but had a blast and got a bunch of stuff. Paul and I were exhausted as well.
Since yesterday was so crazy and tiring we just chilled after we got home from church today. We tried to get Belle to take a nap but no such luck which made for a very cranky girl. We also did some research for our adoption and have officially made a plan to save money and the fund raising to do and grants to apply for. Paul set up Belle's sand box and he washed his car. If only he would wash mine! So all in all a lot is going on including get a new car for Paul. Praying for guidance and provision for our adoption and other things coming up.
Since yesterday was so crazy and tiring we just chilled after we got home from church today. We tried to get Belle to take a nap but no such luck which made for a very cranky girl. We also did some research for our adoption and have officially made a plan to save money and the fund raising to do and grants to apply for. Paul set up Belle's sand box and he washed his car. If only he would wash mine! So all in all a lot is going on including get a new car for Paul. Praying for guidance and provision for our adoption and other things coming up.
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