Memories

So over the last week, I have been reminded of the anniversaries of the tornado that hit LaPlata in 2002, and the subsequent passing of my grandmother 11 years ago today. And in less than a week now will be the 3 year anniversary of my dads passing. For some reason this has been a tad harder. I miss my grandmother very much and this year I look back on her fondly and with some sadness that she is no longer here with me. I know that everything happens for a reason and everyone has a limited amount of time so no matter what it was her time. She passed as a result of the tornado. She had an asthma attack during it and went into cardiac arrest. When she passed away I decided that if I were to ever have a girl her middle name would be the same as my grandmothers. I kept to my word. Belle's middle name is Jeane. And my word is Belle living up to her namesakes! My grandmother was a caring, loving, and funny person. She was also very stubborn! I connected with my grandmother very well for a variety of reasons. And I feel like now I could connect with her even more if she were still here. She and I just had a bond, yeah I got annoyed with her as a teen but I could trust her with things, and get good advice I could understand from her. I wish I could still talk to her today and tell her all that has gone on, but I can't. That is what makes death so hard. It is not hard on those that pass but on those that are left behind. But I told Belle a little about her and I will continue to do so as she grows up. Same as my dad. I cannot say why but I miss my dad. I have the same wishes that I do about my grandmother. Grief is such a strange thing. You think that you have gone through all the stages and such and boom here you are sad again. I don't think grief ever truly has a closure or end. You will always remember and miss that person. You may accept it and be in that stage but no matter what you still feel it. We will always feel that loss until we meet our loved ones again. And just because we "move on" doesn't mean you don't miss them, or feel sad sometimes. Just my thoughts for today. More on everyday stuff later!